49. An Insightful Week

Dear readers,

This week was super hectic because I had to do a case study and submit that case study in the same week. Wasn’t really happy with that. This weekend I’m expected to do another case study and submit it on Monday. I hope it turns out to be good. And once I’m done with my case study, my preparations for my exams will begin. I really hope I don’t find the urge to be lazy and procrastinate, because I really want to do well in my exams.

I have not been really going to the gym for the past 10 days. I need to start doing that as well. The week after this, I have something planned that I have wanted to do for as long as I can remember. The dream that seemed distant now seems not so distant anymore. Hopefully, that starts in the second week of October. I’ll announce that once I can actually do it.

One other interesting thing happened this week. I put in a lot of effort into how I look in terms of my dressing because it was cultural week in my college. I didn’t apply make-up or change the way I wear my hair, but I just wore new styles of clothes than what I normally wouldn’t wear. I learnt a lot with this change in attires. A few of them are:

Firstly, I shocked myself and the people around me for being able to pull off such clothes. No one expected me to wear such authentic Indian clothes and be able to look good in them, as well.

Secondly, since I was able to pull it off, it acted as a huge confidence boost. I was getting random compliments from people I barely talk to. People were noticing me when I was walking, which made me super conscience. Maybe they always noticed me, but they made it evident this week, some even smiled at me. Some were hesitant to tell me I look good and some couldn’t stop staring at me. Which made me realise how much of an impact clothes can have on people.

Thirdly and weirdly enough, (some of you may think I’m lying or I’m just crazy) I found myself wondering if all of this was fake. It wasn’t, and I know it wasn’t fake. I did look good and the people around me also felt the same way. But I couldn’t help myself but think about and be extremely grateful for those people in my life who call me “beautiful”, “lovely” and other adjectives that make me feel good, when I’m not dressed up and when I don’t put in efforts to “look pretty”. So, I have this new-found admiration for people who called me pretty adjectives on “normal days”.

Yes, this doesn’t mean I am never going to dress up or I’m only going to wear pretty clothes. No extremes. If the situation demands me to wear something out of the ordinary, now I will gladly wear it because now I have the confidence that I would be able to pull it off. But on days when it’s not necessary, I will gladly be comfortable wearing the clothes that I usually wear. But I understood that I should not use my clothes as a medium to gain people’s attention or to seek validation.

This coming week, I have three aims: study well, go the gym all 7 days and read! Hope you all had a great week. Let me know what you thought about this blog in the comment section below. Let’s all have a great and productive week. See you, next Sunday!

Realistic Beginner.

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